decisions, decisions

something i have never been good at is making up my mind.  decisions and i are worst enemies, especially when it involves someone i love.  the issue andy and i go back in forth on is the education of our children.  public or private, more academic or less.  honestly, it keeps me up at night and becomes an obsession.  i am learning that as a parent i second guess my decisions even more because now it effects 5 other people.  hoping i can get some rest and the right choice will come in my sleep... a dream... or i will wake up tomorrow and still have to make a decision.

fun filled friday afternoon

Huddle Up Sports Camp

he is the smallest one in camp huddle up, but that does not slow him down... at all.

happy 7 weeks

lily grace... 7 weeks

lukey

luke has always been my challenge.  when he is good, he is so much fun and a delight to be around.  but when he is bad, watch out.  i am not sure what to do with him.  what i want most is for all of my children to be happy.  happy littles = happy mama.  however, luke just throws me for a loop.  if anyone gets something and he does not, he feels cheated.  he hides everything in his room.  does not want to share.  will break logan's drawings and toys if he can.  the most upsetting is when he hits or pinches his brother, he can be so mean and it breaks logan's (and my) heart to have him act like this.  it can make the perfect day turn into a nightmare when he is acting out, it upsets everyone and i do not like the mood that it sets in our home.  i have tried and tried to get him to stop, explain that he needs to treat others with respect.  at school, the teachers say he is great, the problem truly comes out when he is at home.  what am i doing wrong?  its a big weight and constant worry... i hope to find an answer soon.  please God, send me a clue...

happy anniversary

7 years!  my oh my how time is passing me by.  we did not make it out to dinner, but we got in a yummy lunch between drop offs and pick ups!  no wine but flourless chocolate cake for desert.  love my hubby!

too tired

there are so many things i want to put into words, so many moments i never want to forget.  but at the end of the day, i am still so tired to think. all i want is to lay my head down on my freshly washed sheets, go to sleep and have a nice dream.  why am i so tired?  i have five reasons...

happy birthday lukey!

six years ago i was enjoying my first born son... may 22nd at 2am i went into labor and luke entered the world by 6am that beautiful morning.  he told us that it was his best birthday ever.  favorite present was his new backpack, water bottle, and lunch box from nana.  i did try to make an ice cream cake that turned into a mess, but still tasted good.

to big to be a gecko

so much going on over the past weekend, i am afraid to miss it all.  last days of school, graduations, birthdays, anniversaries.   

logan told me that he is to big to be a gecko and its time for him to move on to a new class... tears, this boy is already to move on, i'm not!

goodbye ms sue

goodbye ms giselle

goodbye ms mary

i will miss you all!

logan "i am going to marry lily, i lover her"
luke "you cant marry your sister, logan"
logan "well then, lily is going to marry me"
:-)

ready for summer sun, love him, love him, love him...

smiles and frogs

conversation with luke about freedom...  he is almost 6 and asks me about freedom and what it means.  we talk about how everyone has rights, regardless of their age, color, etc. etc.  he wants to know why, and i say because everyone is created equal.  it does not matter what color you are, if you are big or small, poor or rich.  then he tells me 'oh yeah, your right, unless you are a frog'.  ??? oh to be 6 again!!!

i have seen lily with little smiles on her face while she dreams and i hold her in my arms.  today, however, was the first time, she looked right into my eyes and smiled a few times.  it was so sweet, she even tried to cue, tears in my eyes...

trying to keep up

where does the time go?  

luke is getting ready to finish kindergarden and has a million questions every waking moment of the day.  he never stops, what i would do to have as much energy as he does!  he loves to read at night and is able to focus for such a long period of time on his books.  it is hard because the other ones do not find the books that i read to luke all that interesting and lose their interest fast.  i wish i had more time to spend with him right now.  kinda hard with andrew traveling

logan just wants to kiss lily, tell her she is 'so cute', and give her a hug.  he cannot wait for her to be awake and says that she loves him.  at school he shows her how he spells and writes his name.  he loves her the best because she is a girl.

landon has spent so much time with nana, i think he forgets who i am.  mommy... who is that, oh yeah, bye mommy!  he will be the first one out the house.  we are starting to work on potty training, well, sort of, he sits on the potty and tries, then pees on the floor or in his brookies.  

and lily grace is already one month!!! how did that happen?  one month? and i still dont feel like i have my act together.  i guess everyone is fed and cared for, and i think happy.  lily is up about every 3 to 4 hours.  she is already outgrowing her newborn clothes :-(. cant she just stay little?  if only i could stop time... take a really long nap, shower, go shopping, have some me time.... then start the clock again.  before i know it, they will all be grown up and i will be looking back wishing they were all little again.